


tired.

by 2thousand0423



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: M/M, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-13
Updated: 2019-04-13
Packaged: 2020-01-12 14:08:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18448145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/2thousand0423/pseuds/2thousand0423
Summary: Jeno's bed has never felt so cold.





	tired.

Jeno's tired of seeing Donghyuck's back.   
  
The way Donghyuck stretches and thanks Jeno for the good time, the way he picks up his clothes and starts to dress up, acting as if nothing happened.   
  
Donghyuck gives Jeno one final, tired smile before he leaves, turning away and closing the door behind him, backpack hanging on one strap on his right shoulder.

The light from the well-lit hallway illuminated Jeno’s face for a short second before his room was drenched in a somber black again.   
  
Jeno was fucking exhausted.   
  


  
/   
  


  
Donghyuck takes longer to get up from Jeno's bed this time.   
  


It was 10:33 PM when Donghyuck arrived, mascara running down his face in silent tears.   
  
It was 12:27 AM when they finished, sweaty and out of breath.   
  
It was 1:01 AM when Donghyuck stood up, picked up his clothes from the floor and gone out Jeno's door without a single word uttered.

 

 

Jeno knew exactly why and he hated it.   
  
  


/   


  
  
Donghyuck sighed.   
  
It was silent, the way Jeno fell in love with Donghyuck. He had barely even noticed it himself.

 

  
  
Jeno and Donghyuck were face to face, both their hands curled in front of their faces, but not enough to cover their eyes from one another.

The room was dimly lit like always, the only thing providing them light was the moon from outside Jeno’s window. Everything seemed to slow down, and to Jeno, they were the only ones who existed on earth right now.  
  
Jeno groaned and looked up, left arm covering his eyes, breathing becoming unsteady, almost sounding like tiny cries of help in Jeno’s ears.  
  
"Hey. You okay?"  
  
Jeno chuckled, inhaling a sharp breath to keep his mouth from quivering, "I should be asking you that. This thing has been going on longer than I thought it would." Jeno suddenly felt cold, even underneath his comforter.  
  
"If you hate this we can stop— I mean— I'm not forcing you to do this or anything, we can stop if you want to—” Donghyuck hurried out.  
  
"Chill. I know. I'm just saying... What are you gonna do about Mark?" Jeno looked away from the ceiling, pretending to feel sleepy and pressing his face onto his pillow. He didn't want Donghyuck seeing tears run down his cheeks.  
  
Donghyuck was silent for a while.  
  


 

  
Jeno feared that. Donghyuck was never so quiet.   
  
In the softest whisper, Donghyuck said, "I don't know."

 

 

And Jeno hated that.   
  


/   
  
  
Jeno and Donghyuck still kept meeting every night.   
  
Sometimes Jeno was lucky and Donghyuck would only come over for friendly company, doing his homework in the presence of Jeno. Jeno was the happiest during these times.   
  
"Loser, stop biting your pencil, you're gonna break your teeth," Jeno said.   
  
In a muffled voice, Donghyuck replied, "I don' care."   
  
Jeno just rolled his eyes, standing up from his bean bag whilst carelessly dropping his controller on the carpeted floor. Heaving himself on Donghyuck's lap, wrapping his arms around Donghyuck's neck.   
  
Donghyuck released a wheeze at the impact, "LEE JENO YOU FUCKING FATASS. GET OFF OF ME." Donghyuck wqs squealing and giggling at the same time, but he still continued to cling onto Jeno's waist though, fearing for Jeno's fall.  _ ‘Ironic,’  _ Jeno thought.   
  
Jeno just laughed, "But I'm boooored and you aren't paying attention to me." Jeno gave Donghyuck exaggerated puppy eyes with the full-blown pouting included.   
  
"Ugh fine. I'll play with you."   
  
"Thank you!"   
  
  


/   
  


  
Jeno's face was buried in Donghyuck's bare chest, they were both sweaty as hell, but that didn't stop them from cuddling. Donghyuck had his arms wrapped around Jeno's head, delicate fingers gently carding their way through Jeno's soft black hair.   
  
Jeno didn't want to talk. This time he wanted the silence. He loved it. Everything was perfect even if it was just for a second.   
  
  


  
"What do you think I should do?" Donghyuck broke the silence.   
  
Jeno steeled himself for this conversation, he knew it was bound to come, "First of all, what do you want to happen?"   
  
Jeno's thankful he doesn't have to face Donghyuck right now, burying his face deeper into Donghyuck’s chest and tightening his hold on Donghyuck.

  
"Of course I want him to like me back, is that even a question, you dumb-dumb."

Jeno could just  _ hear  _ Donghyuck rolling his eyes with a fond, cheeky smile.   
  
"Okay then. Just tell him you like him. I've seen the way he looks at you." Jeno smiled sweetly,  _ ‘It's the same way I look at you.’ _ _   
_   
Donghyuck goes silent again. Jeno had a love-hate relationship with sadness   
  
__ 'I'm sorry I fell in love with you.'   
  
Jeno slowly pulls away, giving a forced smile, hoping to whatever god there is that Donghyuck doesn't notice anything wrong.   
  
"You got this. Don't worry too much."   
  


 

/

  
  


Did Jeno ever mention why he hated having sex with Donghyuck so much?   
  
No. It's not because he moans out Mark's name like a dog in fucking heat, Donghyuck has more decency than that, but it's because Jeno just knows Donghyuck's thinking of Mark during a time like this. While Jeno's pounding into him, Donghyuck squeezes his eyes closed, blunt nails digging into Jeno's back, letting out breathless whimpers.   
  
Jeno blinks his tears away, blaming them on the overwhelming heat.   
  
"Baby, you feel so good riding my dick like that."   
  
"I-I know, h-hnnggg."   
  
They both finish off.   
  
Donghyuck gets up. Stretches. Thanks Jeno for the good time. Picks up his clothes. Dresses himself up. And acts as if nothing happened.   
  
"Bye, Jeno."   
  
"Goodnight, Donghyuck."

 

 

Jeno was drenched in the darkness alone again.   
  
  


/   
  


  
Donghyuck came barging in Jeno's room, not bothering to knock, "I told him, Jeno. I fucking told him."   
  
Jeno was speechless and it takes him a solid minute to reply, "W-Well that's good isn't it? What did he say?"   
  
"He said he likes me back."   
  
Jeno's heart sank. He didn’t know what to feel, he just knew he was tired.   
  
"O-Oh? He did? That's great."   
  
Donghyuck hugged Jeno.   
  
It seemed strangely like a goodbye of sorts.   
  
Jeno's stomach starts to knot.   
  
"I'm happy for you, Hyuck. I really am," Jeno wills the tears away, closing his eyes tightly, hugging Donghyuck tighter. It was all he could do. It was all he would let himself do.   
  
Donghyuck lets go first, kissing Jeno's cheek briefly, "Thank you, Jeno." Donghyuck had the brightest smile, Jeno’s room suddenly felt a little brighter.   
  
Donghyuck gave Jeno one last fond look before heading out the door.   
  
His back was on Jeno for the last time.   
  
Jeno was tired of seeing Donghyuck's back.   
  
  


/   
  
  
Donghyuck stopped his nightly visits after that day.   
  
Jeno missed him.   
  
Jeno sometimes sees Donghyuck with Mark though. Donghyuck would be clinging on to Mark's arm and Mark would be laughing at something sarcastic Donghyuck said. Donghyuck would meet his eyes and smile a little and Jeno would do the same, looking and walking away a little too quickly.   
  
_ ‘I'm happy you're happy.’ _ _   
_ __   
  


/

  
  
Donghyuck and Jeno were gaming.   
  
"It's been a while since you visited, loser," Jeno's eyes left the screen for a moment to stare at Donghyuck. Donghyuck was wearing a too big flannel, it was probably Mark's.   
  
"Sorry, I've been busy."   
  
_ ‘With Mark. I know.’ _   
  
"It's okay. I understand. You seem happier nowadays though."   
  
Donghyuck let out a quiet and short laugh, "Why wouldn't I be? I got the boy of my dreams, what else could I ask for?"   
  
Jeno looked back at the screen.

  
Jeno was tired, but for Donghyuck he wouldn’t stop trying.   



End file.
